My parents were married for 55 years. One morning,
my mom was going downstairs to make dad breakfast, she had a heart attack and
fell. My father picked her up as best he could and almost dragged her into the
truck. At full speed, without respecting traffic lights, he drove her to the
hospital.
When he arrived, unfortunately she was no longer
with us.
During the funeral, my father did not speak; his
gaze was lost. He hardly cried.
That night, his children joined him. In an
atmosphere of pain and nostalgia, we remembered beautiful anecdotes and he
asked my brother, a theologian, to tell him where Mom would be as others began
to talk about life after death and guesses as to how and where she would be.
My father listened carefully. Suddenly he asked us
to take him to the cemetery.
"Dad!" we replied, "it's 11 at
night, we can't go to the cemetery right now!"
He raised his voice, and with a glazed look he
said: "Don't argue with me, please don't argue with the man who just lost
his wife of 55 years."
There was a moment of respectful silence, we didn't
argue anymore. We went to the cemetery. With a flashlight we reached her grave.
My father sat down, prayed, and told his children:
"It was 55 years... you know? No one can really talk about true love if
haven't done life with a person."
He paused and wiped his face.
"She and I, we were together in the good and
in the bad." he continued. "When I changed jobs, we packed up when we
sold the house and moved. We shared the joy of seeing our children become
parents, together we mourned the departure of loved ones, we prayed together in
the waiting room of some hospitals, we supported each other in pain, we hugged
one another each day, and we forgave mistakes."
And then he paused and added, "Children,
that's all gone and I'm happy tonight. Do you know why I'm happy? Because she
left before me. She didn't have to go through the agony and pain of burying me,
of being left alone after my departure. I will be the one to go through that,
and I thank God for that. I love her so much that I wouldn't have liked her to
suffer..."
When my father finished speaking, my brothers and I
had tears streaming down our faces. We hugged him and he comforted us,
"It's okay. We can go home. It's been a good day."
That night I understood what true love is. It is
more than just romanticism and sex, it's two people who stand beside one
another, who are committed to one another ... through all the good and bad that
life throws at you.
