If you love her enough

 

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If You Love Her Enough

 My friend John always has something to tell me. He knows so much that young men have to have older and more worldly wise men to advise them. For instance who to trust, how to care for others, and how to live life to the fullest.

Recently, John lost his wife Janet. For eight years she fought against cancer, but in the end her sickness had the last word.

One day John took out a folded piece of paper from his wallet. He had found when he tidied up some drawers at home. It was a small love letter Janet had written. The note could look like a school girl's scrawls about her dream guy. All that was missing was a drawing of a heart with the names John and Janet written in it. But the small letter was written by a woman who had had seven children; a woman who fought for her life and who probably only had a few months left to live.

It was also a beautiful recipe for how to keep a relationship together.

Janet's description of her husband begins thus: "Loved me. Took care of me. Worried about me."

Even though John always had a ready answer, he never joked about cancer apparently. Sometimes he came home in the evening to find Janet in the middle of one of those depressions cancer patients so often get. In no time he got her into the car and drove her to her favourite restaurant. He showed consideration for her, and she knew it. You cannot hide something for someone who knows better.

 

"Helped me when I was ill," the next line reads. Perhaps Janet wrote this while the cancer was in one of the horrible and wonderful lulls. Where everything is -- almost -- as it used to be, before the sickness broke out, and where it doesn't hurt to hope that everything is over, maybe forever.  "Forgave me a lot."   "Stood by my side."

And a piece of good advice for everyone who looks on giving constructive criticism as a kind of sacred duty: "Always praising."

"Made sure I had everything I needed," she goes on to write. After that she has turned over the paper and added: "Warmth. Humour. Kindness. Thoughtfulness." And then she writes about the husband she has lived with and loved the most of her life: "Always there for me when I needed you."

The last words she wrote sum up all the others. I can see her for me when she adds thoughtfully:  "Good friend."

I stand beside John now, and cannot even pretend to know how it feels to lose someone who is as close to me as Janet was to him. I need to hear what he has to say much more than he needs to talk.  "John," I ask. "How do you stick together with someone through 38 years -- not to mention the sickness? How do I know if I can bear to stand by my wife's side if she becomes sick one day?" "You can," he says quietly. "If you love her enough, you can."

 

300 "Nutrition for the Soul"0

So, how are you living your "Dash" ?                                                                                                             and during your "Dash" are you "Keeping your Dreams alive" ?

Keep Your Dream

Never let anyone take your dreams from you...check out this story.

 

I have a friend named Monty Roberts who owns a horse ranch in San Ysidro. He has let me use his house to put on fund-raising events to raise money for youth at risk programs.

The last time I was there he introduced me by saying, "I want to tell you why I let Jack use my horse. It all goes back to a story about a young man who was the son of an itinerant horse trainer who would go from stable to stable, race track to race track, farm to farm and ranch to ranch, training horses. As a result, the boy's high school career was continually interrupted. When he was a senior, he was asked to write a paper about what he wanted to be and do when he grew up.

"That night he wrote a seven-page paper describing his goal of someday owning a horse ranch. He wrote about his dream in great detail and he even drew a diagram of a 200-acre ranch, showing the location of all the buildings, the stables and the track. Then he drew a detailed floor plan for a 4,000-square-foot house that would sit on a 200-acre dream ranch.

"He put a great deal of his heart into the project and the next day he handed it in to his teacher. Two days later he received his paper back. On the front page was a large red F with a note that read, `See me after class.'

"The boy with the dream went to see the teacher after class and asked, `Why did I receive an F?'

"The teacher said, `This is an unrealistic dream for a young boy like you. You have no money. You come from an itinerant family. You have no resources. Owning a horse ranch requires a lot of money. You have to buy the land. You have to pay for the original breeding stock and later you'll have to pay large stud fees. There's no way you could ever do it.' Then the teacher added, `If you will rewrite this paper with a more realistic goal, I will reconsider your grade.'

"The boy went home and thought about it long and hard. He asked his father what he should do. His father said, `Look, son, you have to make up your own mind on this. However, I think it is a very important decision for you.' "Finally, after sitting with it for a week, the boy turned in the same paper, making no changes at all.

He stated, "You can keep the F and I'll keep my dream."

Monty then turned to the assembled group and said, "I tell you this story because you are sitting in my 4,000-square-foot house in the middle of my 200-acre horse ranch. I still have that school paper framed over the fireplace." He added, "The best part of the story is that two summers ago that same schoolteacher brought 30 kids to camp out on my ranch for a week." When the teacher was leaving, he said, "Look, Monty, I can tell you this now. When I was your teacher, I was something of a dream stealer. During those years I stole a lot of kids' dreams. Fortunately you had enough gumption not to give up on yours."

"Don't let anyone steal your dreams. Follow your heart, no matter what."

 

A SECRET PLACE

I have found a place to go where the grass is always green. 
It is a place where you can sit and do nothing. 
It is a place made just for you.
You can actually decorate it yourself. 
This place can be a good place to go after a long hard day at work or school. 
It is sanctuary where you can pray or talk to a friend. 
You can also make lifelong friends here. 
This special place is where everyone can find it, yet not all do. 
It is a secret place, you don't even have to tell anyone that you have it, 
But it will show on your face. 
The road to this place is not external, but internal. 
You can make this journey sitting in a chair. 
This journey can take minutes, days, or even years. 
I must warn you though, this place can disappear,
Be painful if not taken care of properly. 
This place I speak of is the soul of a peaceful person.

" A Good Day" by Brother David Steindl- Rast

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Zl9puhwiyw&t=64s&ab_channel=GratefulLiving

A message for self...
..

Stephen Covey Quote on Main Thing = Focus

Something inside so strong

Song by Labi Siffre

 

… The higher you build your barriers
The taller I become
The further you take my rights away
The faster I will run
You can deny me, you can decide
To turn your face away
No matter 'cause there's

… Something inside so strong
I know that I can make it
Though you're doing me wrong, so wrong
You thought that my pride was gone, oh no
There's something inside so strong
Oh, something inside so strong

… The more you refuse to hear my voice (ooh-weh ooh-weh ooh-weh ooh-weh)
The louder I will sing
You hide behind walls of Jericho (ooh-weh ooh-weh ooh-weh ooh-weh)
Your lies will come tumbling
Deny my place in time, you squander wealth that's mine
My light will shine so brightly it will blind you
Because there's

… Something inside so strong, strong
I know that I can make it
Though you're doing me wrong, so wrong
You thought that my pride was gone, oh no
There's something inside so strong
Oh, something inside so strong

… Brothers and sisters
When they insist we're just not good enough
Well we know better
Just look him in his eyes and say
We're gonna do it anyway
We're gonna do it anyway

… There's something inside so strong
And I know that I can make it
Though you're doing me wrong, so wrong
You thought that my pride was gone, oh no
There's something inside so strong, oh
Something inside so strong

… Brothers and sisters
When they insist we're just not good enough
Well we know better
Just look him in his eyes and say
We're gonna do it anyway
We're gonna do it anyway
We're gonna do it anyway
We're gonna do it anyway
Because there's

… Something inside so strong, (something inside so strong)
I know that I can make it
Though you're doing me wrong, so wrong
You thought that my pride was gone, oh no, oh no
There's something inside so strong
Something inside so strong (oh oh yeah)
I know that I can make it
Though you're doing me wrong, so wrong
You thought that my pride was gone, oh no, oh no
There's something inside so strong

… Oh oh, something inside so strong
Oh oh, something inside so strong
Oh oh, something inside so strong

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VD4rXfdvbYo&ab_channel=BCDIGreensboro

Think in Ink- Importance of writing things down

A daily meditation and a resource for Graduation.+

Desiderata Les Crane

.
Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible without surrender,
Be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly, and listen to others -
Even the dull and ignorant, they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons - they are vexations to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter,
For always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career -
However humble, it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs,
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is.
Many persons strive for high ideals,
and everywhere life is full of heroism.
Be yourself.
Especially do not feign affection, neither be cynical about love.
For in the face of all aridity and disenchantment,
It is as perennial as the grass.
Take kindly the council of the years,
Gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune,
But do not distress yourself with imaginings -
Many fears are borne of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe.
No less than the trees and the stars, you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
No doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore, be at peace with God, whatever you conceive him to be.
And whatever your labours and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life,
Keep peace with your soul.
With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be careful. Strive to be happy.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2yNJaKF9sXA&ab_channel=Anna

and another useful one to use at Graduation. 

Everybody's free ( to wear Sunscreen )

Ladies and gentlemen of the class of '97, wear sunscreen.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it.
The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists,
whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable
than my own, meandering experience.
I will dispense this advice, now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth.
But never mind, you will not
understand the power and beauty
of your youth until they've faded.
But trust me, in twenty years,
you will look back at photos of yourself and
recall --- in a way you can't grasp now --- how much
possibility lay before you
and how fabulous you really looked.

You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future.
Or worry, knowing that worry is just as
effective as trying to solve an
algebra equation by chewing bubble gum.
The real troubles in your life
are apt to be things that never
crossed your worried mind.
The kind that blind sides you at
4 PM on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts,
don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don't waste your time on jealousy.
Sometimes you're ahead.
Sometimes you're behind.
The race is long and in the end,
it's only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive.
Forget the insults.
If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.
Keep your old love letters.
Throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what to do with your life.
The most interesting people I know
didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives.
Some of the most interesting 40 year olds still don't.

Get plenty of calcium.
Be kind to your knees.
You'll miss them when they're gone.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't.
Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't.
Maybe you'll divorce at 40.
Maybe you'll dance the 'Funky Chicken' on your
75th wedding anniversary.
Whatever you do,
don't congratulate yourself too much
or berate yourself either.
Your choices are half chance.
So are everybody else's.

Enjoy your body.

Use it everywhere you can.
Don't be afraid of it or
what other people think of it.
It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.

Dance.

Even if you have nowhere to do it
but your own living room.

Read the directions even if you don't follow them.
Do not read beauty magazines.
They will only make you feel ugly.

Brother and sister, together we'll make it through.
Someday our spirit will take you and guide you there.
I know you've been hurting,
but I've been waiting to be there for you.
And I'll be there, just helping, well, whenever I can.

Get to know your parents.
You never know when they'll be gone for good.

Be nice to your siblings.
They are your best link to your past and
the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go.
But for a precious few, you should hold on.

Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle,
for as the older you get, the more you need
the people you knew when you were young.

Live in New York City once,
but leave before it makes you hard.
Live in northern California once,
but leave before it makes you soft.

Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths.
Prices will rise. Politicians will philander.
You, too, will get old.
And when you do,
you'll fantasize that when you were young,
prices were reasonable,
politicians were noble
and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don't expect anyone else to support you.
Maybe you have a trust fund,
maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse,
but you never know when either one might run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair
or by the time you're forty, it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy,
but be patient with those who supply it.
Advice is a form of nostalgia.
Dispensing it is a way of
wishing the past from the disposal,
wiping it off, painting over the
ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.

Brother and sister, together we'll make it through.
Someday our spirit will take you and guide you there.
I know you've been hurting,
but I've been waiting to be there for you.
And I'll be there, just helping, well, whenever I can.

Everybody's free.
Everybody's free to feel good.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5giWfpANMac&ab_channel=TheMsmjlg