Friday, 10 September 2021

Teachers Make a Difference

 




The First Question This Teacher Asks Her Kindergarteners Every Morning  

BY ALICE GOMSTYN 

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About a decade ago, I stood in a high school English classroom, trying my best to give an exciting speech about my experiences as a young reporter. I worked for the local newspaper at the time and the school had invited me and a photographer to give the students a sense of the career opportunities available to them.

The teens all sat politely, if not quite rapt … except for one. He was a short, scrawny kid in an oversized hoodie. I could see him fidget and, worse, heard him mutter the occasional complaint about my presentation. Finally, he seemed to surrender to the fact that yes, I would be there for at least a few more minutes but instead of perking his ears up to listen, he lay his head down on his desk.

His teacher approached him and I expected some form of discipline would ensue. Instead, she gently put her arm around him and said something in a soft voice. I couldn’t make out exactly what it was, but it was clear she wasn’t scolding him — just showing some TLC. I felt mildly annoyed, to say the least. A child was acting rudely during my talk and there’d be no consequence for it?

It only hit me later that the student’s behaviour likely had little to do with me. The school served mostly poor students, more than half of whom qualified for free or reduced-cost lunches. The odds were good that this kid faced dire straits outside school hours. Maybe he was cranky because he had skipped a meal or two. Maybe he was tired because he didn’t have a comfortable place to sleep. Maybe he didn’t have a home at all. Whatever his problems were, his teacher saw fit to offer him compassion instead of punishment.

I thought about them both as I read a recent story in The Washington Post reporting that more than half of U.S. public school students live in poverty. The statistic itself is shocking, but what moved me even more was an anecdote about a kindergarten teacher in Albuquerque. Sonya Romero-Smith shows her young students some TLC, too, in part by stocking a drawer full of clean kids’ socks, underwear, and pants for the children.



“When they first come in my door in the morning, the first thing I do is an inventory of immediate needs: Did you eat? Are you clean?” she told The Post.

My older son is nearly kindergarten age and he’s never short on food or clean clothing. No one should be, but especially not children that small, that vulnerable. It breaks my heart to imagine the circumstances Romero-Smith’s students leave behind when they reach her door.

I wanted to know more about life inside and outside of Romero-Smith’s classroom, so I emailed her with questions both specific and broad. I asked her, for starters, why it was that kids came to school dirty. (Answer: It can be difficult to access bathroom and cleaning facilities in crowded homeless shelters and motels.) I asked why students were arriving hungry when there are government resources like food stamps available. (Answer: Food stamp allotments don’t stretch that far and, as others have noted, the cheapest foods are often the most processed and least nutritious.)

If my questions sound naive, it’s largely because I live in a comfortably upper-middle class bubble. In my community, the loudest school-related gripes I hear are about standardized testing or athletics. Outside of scattered charity efforts, it can be easy for a parent in my neighbourhood to forget that so many school children have far more pressing concerns than whether the local football field is in tip-top shape.

Romero-Smith’s toughest day, she said, came when authorities removed a malnourished child from her classroom after it was discovered that one of his parents had overdosed on drugs.

“Having a 5-year-old beg not to be taken away by police was devastating. I remember I gave this child the only thing I could find which was a stuffed toy that I had in the class,” she said. “I told this child that I would make sure he was OK and that all I wanted him to do was love and care for this stuffed toy.”

It was Romero-Smith’s desperate, last-ditch effort to comfort the traumatized boy … and, amazingly, it seemed to work.

“Several weeks later, his foster parent brought him back to our school and he returned that stuffed toy and said he never let the toy ‘be lonely,'” she told me. “It was truly humbling.”

It’s mind-boggling to imagine the painful worries weighing on the minds of teachers like Romero-Smith and others. Not only must they focus on providing an education to their students, they must jump hurdle after hurdle to get their young charges to a place where they’re capable of learning at all.

“Our job, as teachers, is to ensure emotional and social well-being as well as academics,” she told me.

Romero-Smith has a busy schedule. In addition to the demands of her teaching job, she’s also a foster mother to two young sisters — students from her school who were recently homeless. But she took time to answer my questions because she said she wanted to help “give a voice to the voiceless” — other impoverished children who are at risk of never breaking the cycle of poverty.

“Their stories need to shared to provoke action and change but also to show the realities that can be difficult to understand,” she said.

In the meantime, Romero-Smith keeps plugging away in her classroom, remaining optimistic and encouraging her students.

“I keep going because I know they matter,” she said. “Every one of them is full of greatness.”



I’ll never know what happened to the fidgety kid who nearly snored his way through my talk some ten years ago. But I’m glad that soft-spoken teacher showed him compassion. Maybe she saw greatness in him, too. I hope, despite the odds, that he achieved it.

Finally here is an idea for teachers.




Saturday, 4 September 2021

Take Responsibility



 




Take Responsibility

My mom did not sleep. She felt exhausted. She was irritable, grumpy, and bitter. She was always sick until one day, suddenly, she changed.

One day my dad said to her:

- I've been looking for a job for three months and I haven't found anything, I'm going to have a few beers with friends.

My mom replied:

- It's okay.

My brother said to her:

- Mom, I'm doing poorly in all subjects at the University.

My mom replied:

- Okay, you will recover, and if you don't, well, you repeat the semester, but you pay the tuition.

My sister said to her:

- Mom, I smashed the car.

My mom replied:

- Okay daughter, take it to the car shop & find how to pay and while they fix it, get around by bus or subway.

Her daughter-in-law said to her:

- Mother-in-law, I came to spend a few months with you.

My mom replied:

- Okay, settle in the living room couch and look for some blankets in the closet.

All of us gathered worried to see these reactions coming from Mom.

We suspected that she had gone to the doctor and that she was prescribed some pills called "I don't give a damn”... Perhaps she was overdosing on these!

We then proposed to do an "intervention" w/my mother to remove her from any possible addiction she had towards some anti-tantrum medication.

But then ... she gathered us around her and my mom explained:

"It took me a long time to realize that each person is responsible for their life. It took me years to discover that my anguish, anxiety, my depression, my courage, my insomnia & my stress, does not solve your problems but aggravates mine.

I am not responsible for the actions of anyone & it’s not my job to provide happiness but I am responsible for the reactions I express to that.

Therefore, I came to the conclusion that my duty to myself is to remain calm and let each one of you solve what corresponds to you.

I have taken courses in yoga, meditation, miracles, human development, mental hygiene, vibration and neurolinguistic programming and in all of them, I found a common denominator in them all...

I can only control myself, you have all the necessary resources to solve your own problems despite how hard they may be. My job is to pray for you, love on you, encourage you but it’s up to YOU to solve them & find your happiness.

I can only give you my advice if you ask me & it depends on you to follow it or not. There are consequences, good or bad, to your decisions and YOU have to live them.

So from now on, I cease to be the receptacle of your responsibilities, the sack of your guilt, the laundress of your remorse, the advocate of your faults, the wall of your lamentations, the depositary of your duties, who should solve your problems or spare a tire every time to fulfil your responsibilities.

From now on, I declare all independent and self-sufficient adults.

Everyone at my mom's house was speechless.

From that day on, the family began to function better because everyone in the house knew exactly what it is that they needed to do.

.

.

For some of us this is hard because we've grown up being the caregivers feeling responsible for others. As moms & wives we are fixers off all things. We never want our loved ones to go through difficult things or to struggle. We want everyone to be happy.

But, the sooner we take that responsibility off of our shoulders & on to each loved one, the better we are preparing them to be MEsponsible.

We are not here on earth to be everything to everyone. Stop putting that pressure on yourself.

Much Love;

Charlyn

(shared from a friend)





Saturday, 28 August 2021

I became a Teacher because you inspired me


 

I became a teacher because you inspired me

 

An old man meets a young man who asks:  “Do you remember me?”

And the old man says no. Then the young man tells him he was his student,                                           And the teacher asks:

“What do you do, what do you do in life?”

The young man answers:

“Well, I became a teacher.”

“ah, how good, like me?” Asks the old man.

“Well, yes. In fact, I became a teacher because you inspired me to be like you.”

The old man, curious, asks the young man at what time he decided to become a teacher.                        And the young man tells him the following story:

“One day, a friend of mine, also a student, came in with a nice new watch,                                                  and I decided I wanted it.

I stole it, I took it out of his pocket.

Shortly after, my friend noticed his watch was missing and immediately complained to our teacher, who was you.

Then you addressed the class saying, ‘This student's watch was stolen during classes today. Whoever stole it, please return it.’

I didn't give it back because I didn't want to.

You closed the door and told us all to stand up and form a circle.

You were going to search our pockets one by one until the watch was found.

However, you told us to close our eyes, because you would only look for his watch if we all had our eyes closed.

We did as instructed.

You went from pocket to pocket, and when you went through my pocket, you found the watch and took it. You kept searching everyone's pockets, and when you were done you said ‘open your eyes. We have the watch.’

You didn't tell on me and you never mentioned the episode. You never said who stole the watch either. That day you saved my dignity forever. It was the most shameful day of my life.

But this is also the day I decided not to become a thief, a bad person, etc. You never said anything, nor did you even scold me or take me aside to give me a moral lesson.

I received your message clearly.

Thanks to you, I understood what a real educator needs to do.

Do you remember this episode, professor?

The old professor answered, ‘Yes, I remember the situation with the stolen watch, which I was looking for in everyone’s pocket. I didn't remember you, because I also closed my eyes while looking.’

This is the essence of teaching:

If to correct you must humiliate; you don't know how to teach "





Saturday, 21 August 2021

Dogs are Family


 




Dogs are Family

 

"A man and his dog were walking along a road. The man was enjoying the scenery, when it suddenly occurred to him that he was dead.

He remembered dying, and that the dog walking beside him had been dead for years. He wondered where the road was leading them.

After a while, they came to a high, white stone wall along one side of the road. It looked like fine marble. At the top of a long hill, it was broken by a tall arch that glowed in the sunlight.

When he was standing before it he saw a magnificent gate in the arch that looked like mother-of-pearl, and the street that led to the gate looked like pure gold. He and the dog walked toward the gate, and as he got closer, he saw a man at a desk to one side.

When he was close enough, he called out, 'Excuse me, where are we?'

'This is Heaven, sir,' the man answered.

Would you happen to have some water?' the man asked.

Of course, sir. Come right in, and I'll have some ice water brought right up'. The man gestured, and the gate began to open.

'Can my friend,' gesturing toward his dog, 'come in, too?' the traveller asked.

'I'm sorry, sir, but we don't accept pets.'

The man thought a moment and then turned back toward the road and continued the way he had been going with his dog.

After another long walk, and at the top of another long hill, he came to a dirt road leading through a farm gate that looked as if it had never been closed. There was no fence. As he approached the gate, he saw a man inside, leaning against a tree and reading a book.

'Excuse me!' he called to the man. 'Do you have any water?'

'Yeah, sure, there's a pump over there, come on in..'

'How about my friend here?' the traveller gestured to the dog.

There should be a bowl by the pump.'

They went through the gate, and sure enough, there was an old-fashioned hand pump with a bowl beside it. The traveller filled the water bowl and took a long drink himself, then he gave some to the dog.

When they were full, he and the dog walked back toward the man who was standing by the tree.

'What do you call this place?' the traveller asked.

This is Heaven,' he answered.

'Well, that's confusing,' the traveller said. 'The man down the road said that was Heaven, too.'

'Oh, you mean the place with the gold street and pearly gates? Nope. That's hell.'

'Doesn't it make you mad for them to use your name like that?'

'No, we're just happy that they screen out the folks who would leave their best friends behind.'"

Dogs are family



Saturday, 14 August 2021

From a Distance - Nanci Griffith.

 



From a Distance

Nanci Griffiths

From a distance the world looks blue and green
And the snow capped mountains white
From a distance the ocean meets the stream
And the eagle takes to flight

From a distance there is harmony
And it echoes through the land
It's the voice of hope
It's the voice of peace
It's the voice of every man

From a distance we all have enough
And no one is in need
And there are no guns, no bombs and no disease
No hungry mouths to feed

From a distance we are instruments
Marching in a common band
Playing songs of hope
Playing songs of peace
They are the songs of every man

God is watching us
God is watching us
God is watching us from a distance

From a distance you look like my friend
Even though we are at war
From a distance I just cannot comprehend
What all this fightings for
From…

Link :  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KCzORgC1NpM





Saturday, 26 June 2021

Nelson Mandela - a great man


 

NELSON MANDELA - A Great Man

After becoming president, I asked my escort to lunch at a restaurant. We sat down and each of us asked for what we wanted.

At the front table, there was a man waiting to be answered. When served, I told one of my soldiers: go ask this gentleman to join us. Soldier went and conveyed my invitation to him. The man stood up, took his plate and sat right next to me.

While eating his hands constantly shivered and didn't lift his head off his food. When we were done, he said goodbye to me without just looking at me, I shook his hand and he walked away.

The soldier commented to me:

Madiva that man must have been very sick as his hands wouldn't stop shaking while eating.

No, not at all! The reason for your tremor is another.

So I said to them:

That man was the prison keeper where I was. After he tortured me, I would scream and cry asking for some water and he would humiliate me, laugh at me and instead of giving me water, pissing on my head.

He was sick, he was scared waiting for me now president of South Africa to arrest him and do what he did to me. But that's not who I am, this conduct is not part of my character, nor of my ethics.

′′ Minds seeking vengeance destroy states, while those seeking reconciliation build nations. Walking out the door to my freedom, I knew that if I didn't leave all the anger, hatred and resentment, I would remain a prisoner."

Nelson Mandela.




Friday, 18 June 2021

" Something to think about "


 

Something to think about..

 Barely the day started and... it's already six in the evening.

Barely arrived on Monday and it's already Friday.

... and the month is already over.

... and the year is almost over.

... and already 40, 50 or 60 years of our lives have passed.

... and we realize that we lost our parents, friends.

and we realize it's too late to go back...So... Let's try, despite everything, to enjoy the remaining time...

Let's keep looking for activities that we like...

Let's put some colour in our grey...

Let's smile at the little things in life that put balm in our hearts. And despite everything, we must continue to enjoy with serenity this time we have left.

Let's try to eliminate the afters...

I'm doing it after...

I'll say after...

I'll think about it after...

We leave everything for later like ′′ after ′′ is ours.

Because what we don't understand is that:

Afterwards, the coffee gets cold...

Afterwards, priorities change...

Afterwards, the charm is broken...

afterwards, health passes...

Afterwards, the kids grow up...

Afterwards parents get old...

Afterwards, promises are forgotten...

afterwards, the day becomes the night...

afterwards life ends...

And then it's often too late....So... Let's leave nothing for later...

Because still waiting see you later, we can lose the best moments,

the best experiences,

best friends,

the best family...

The day is today... The moment is now...





"The Bundle of Sticks"

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